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Tell me it’s not true! School has already begun?

These are the thoughts of millions of moms around the world, as they enter into the first few weeks of the school year.

Are you prepared? Do you know what you need to do to stay at the top of your game as a mom with kids in school?

For the past 28 years, number one best-selling author, counselor and life coach David Essel has been helping millions upon millions of people every year get into the practice of self-care, and moms, you might need this more than anyone.

Below, David talks about the six key self care tips, they can help you keep sane, during the school year.

Almost 20 years ago, I worked with my first mom who was having a serious anxiety attack 30 days into the school year.

She was nervous and anxious, because one of her children was going into first grade, and the other child was going to high school… Two daunting experiences for most children in their lifetime.

And she was really feeling their anxiety, and her own.

So, we sat down, over the period of several months, and went over all the most important self care tips that she needed to be following in order to be at her best.

The problem is that she wasn’t doing any of them, and actually felt guilty and filled with shame that she was looking at taking time for herself when she really needed to be putting all of her free time into her children and family.

But she was wrong.

Many women, many moms are wrong when it comes to the amount of time they put into their own self-care versus that of their children and family.

Below, are the six most important key self care tips for all moms to follow, when you have children in school:

Number one. Exercise. I know, I know, I know. You have no time.

Nonsense.

Everyone has time to exercise, it’s whether you want to make it a priority or not.

Exercise of any type releases endorphins in the brain, feel good chemicals, anti-depressant chemicals, that can keep your mood elevated even when you’re going through the stressful experiences that your children are.

What type of exercises is best? The answer to this question is really easy: the type of exercise you’ll do on a regular basis. That’s it. No secrets. That’s it.

So, if you’re into yoga, Pilates, running, weight training, Zumba classes… I could care less what you’re into, just get engaged in the activity 3 to 4 days a week at minimal.

Do you hate all of the above?

Then walk dammit. I’m laughing as I write that, don’t take it personally, it’s just the truth.

No excuses when it comes to exercise. If you want to walk, or that’s the only thing you’ll do, 30 minutes a day minimal, seven days a week is what you need to try to say sane in this world.

Number two.   Stay in close touch with your children’s teachers. Don’t be a nag, but I recommend at least every two weeks to touch base and ask their teachers about your children’s behavior, performance, effort and the end result of their work.

Now for the millions of teachers out there that are also moms that are reading this, you’re probably going to be pissed off at me right now because I’m recommending parents to stay close in touch with you.

It’s OK that you’re irritated with me, but I can tell you from experience, that the very best thing a parent can do is to be in close contact with the only other person that has her children more than she does on a daily basis: teachers.

Number three.  Eat every 3 to 4 hours. Your energy levels, which is tied 100% into your blood sugar levels, need to be elevated throughout the day in order to reduce the chances of irritability, impatience, yelling… At the simplest thing that your children do.

We have found with all of our clients, when they eat every 3 to 4 hours a combination of protein and vegetables or a small amount of fruit, that they dramatically decrease their irrational reactions to the children’s behavior before and or after school. Never, ever, ever skip meals. Every 3 to 4 hours, eat something healthy.

Number four.  Remember, your children are children. I don’t care if they’re six, or 16, they’re kids.

Recently, one of my clients with a 14-year-old child, a young girl, snuck out of the house when she had a sleepover, got in a car full of boys, and they went on a joy ride at midnight.

Everyone was safe, no one got hurt, and when her daughter came back to the house she was filled with guilt and shame for breaking the rule surrounding not leaving the house during a sleepover.

Many parents would absolutely flip out, ground their children for six months or do some other outrageous rages disciplinary action… Because they’re being freaking children.

The role of the child, as they age, is to learn to become independent. To live on their own. To make their own decisions. And guess what mom and dad? They’re going to make mistakes.

If you were the perfect child, good for you, but that’s not normal. Most children will try to push boundaries and territories and we must be firm, without being ridiculous.

My client, recommended when she talked to her former husband, that they take away her privilege for sleepovers for several weeks, and get her involved in community action, whether it’s picking up trash on the side of the road or some kind of service… Which I told her was a brilliant move.

Her husband? He didn’t see it that way. He wanted to be the big bad Wolf. He wanted to go after and beat the hell out of the boys in the car. He wanted to take away her phone and ground her for months. He was being a bully, I’m sorry I’m just gonna call it the way it is.

If you can’t sit down and talk with your children, with a consequence yes, and not bully them and berate them and beat them down, you suck as a parent.

Please get into counseling with someone who can teach you How to be a reasonable adult. If this irritates you, you need a lot of counseling.

And if you really think I’m wrong? Hire me for eight weeks, I’ll work with you one on one and teach you how to be a phenomenal, loving, boundary setting parent… Something this world needs more of.

Number five.   relaxation techniques. Get involved with meditation, deep breathing, you can go and google my relaxation video on YouTube, a brief meditation, and do it every day.

It doesn’t matter if it’s four minutes a day or 30 minutes a day, get into the habit of doing breathing or meditation exercises. I recommend guided breathing or guided meditation, so you don’t have to try to do something that is so foreign for most of us.

This will lower your anxiety, decrease a percentage of depression, boost immune system functioning and much more.

Number six.  Journal every day. Right about the great things your kids are doing, and the challenges they’re offering you. Balance your writing. But get it out of your head on paper, and then you can actually share that with a counselor, minister, priest or life coach if you run into serious parenting issues.

Over the last almost 30 years, I’ve worked with children as low as 10 years of age who are filled with either anxiety or anger all the way up to 18 years of age as they were preparing to leave high school and go on their own… Struggling with alcohol, drugs, peer pressure and more.

There’s a darn good chance as a parent you’re going to need a support system outside of friends and family, once again a counselor, therapist or a life coach could be a saving adjunct, or tool, to your parenting experiences.

Over the last 40 years, I have had the greatest opportunity in the world, to learn how to be a parent to four different children.

A role model. At first, I was overly demanding, yes, I was a bully, and that was in 1980.

Recently, three years ago, I became the male role model for a beautiful 10-year-old little girl who now is 13 1/2, who never had a consistent, loving, caring, male role model… And it is been the most incredible experience for both of us.

But hold on Sally! That doesn’t mean it’s been easy. I’ve had to use incredible patience, outrageous communication skills, and allow her to grow at her rate… Not my rate.

Think about that as a parent.    I know, by following the above six tips, you can rock your own world, and become the parent that maybe you’ve always wanted to have in life.

About David

David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed  by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“

His 10th book, another number one bestseller is called “focus! Slay your goals, the proven guide to huge success, a powerful attitude and profound love. “

His work as a counselor and life coach has been verified by psychology today, and marriage.com verifies David’s work as one of the top relationship counselors and experts in the world.

If you’d like to bring David into your organization as a speaker, or take advantage of his free 15 minute jump start counseling session on the phone, contact us right now at www.davidessel.com by mentioning where you read this article!

Hey all! Big thanks to Katy Blevins for handing over the reins to me at the end of 2017 to fulfill my new years resolution to write...often! Based in Miami, you can find me blogging about family life as a mother of two young kids. But i'll also continue the Chaos and Kiddos theme of business, fashion, parenting, product reviews, and...well, I could go on and on.

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If you’re interested in starting a small business in Florida, one of the first things you need to consider is the current climate in your chosen industry. You don’t want to launch into a field that’s oversaturated while also offering a minimal demand from the public. Differentiation is key, but you should also look for indicators that there’s a strong customer base for your goods and services in a particular area. A souvenir shop will do well in parts of Florida where tourism is high, while a business focused on home repair services is best situated among residential neighborhoods.

Florida is a welcoming state for small businesses. In fact, over 99 percent of businesses in the state are classified as small businesses. This means that you’ll be in good company here, but you’ll also have a lot of competition. At the end of 2016, 18,474 small businesses shut down. Make sure your company isn’t among those to close their doors by taking care of your due diligence before you make that first sale. Planning is critical for new business owners who want to achieve long-term financial success.

From labor costs to tax laws, there’s a lot that you need to know about the area that you choose for your new business venture. Florida offers a wealth of benefits for prospective entrepreneurs. Learn more about the small business climate in the Sunshine State with this infographic. You’ll get valuable details to help you pick the perfect spot for your next venture.

 

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How to Create a Viable Business Plan from Scratch

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An idea is a fragile thing. Millions of people think up brilliant business ideas all the time, yet, few see the light of day. In fact, many would argue that the most difficult aspect of starting a business is transitioning an initial idea into a tangible business model. Fortunately, we’ll help you do just that in this post. Here’s how to create a professional business plan from scratch:

Step #1 Write Everything Down

Even individuals with eidetic memories can forget crucial details after a few hours or days. Starting a business requires a high level of organization, and would-be entrepreneurs need to stay on top of their tasks and responsibilities. As such, make it a point to put your ideas and plans in writing. Doing so will give you a strong point of reference and prevent you from overlooking critical deadlines.

Step #2 Research the Competition

The odds of coming up with a completely unique business idea in a world of over 7 billion people is fairly low. Still, many professionals have crafted successful businesses that tackle old problems in new ways. Before you start drafting any paperwork, though, make it a point to perform market research. Determine who your potential competitors will be, and identify if a profitable opportunity exists within a specific niche. If it doesn’t, then your great idea may not prove all that lucrative in practice.

Step #3 Secure Funding

Whether your company will manufacture polypropylene tubes or develop hair-care products, every business needs funding to get off the ground. Retail space, domain names, employee salaries –– these expenses will add up if you don’t budget for them beforehand. Note that there are plenty of alternative lending options available to ambitious business owners.

Step #4 Set Goals

Business owners will have a difficult time setting up a startup for success if they can’t answer two basic questions: what do they want their business to achieve, and how do they plan on making that happen? This is the crux of any sound business model, and it can take weeks or months to address these two issues. Don’t rush the process; instead, take your time to develop reasonable goals and practical means to reach them. 

Step #5 Sweat the “Small” Stuff 

New business owners have to power through a ton of paperwork before they can open their doors for the first time. It’s easy to dismiss these requirements to focus on “more pressing” concerns, but filing the correct documents can help you avoid massive legal trouble down the line. Get your ducks in a row now or pay for your negligence later –– the choice is yours.

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The Who, What And Why Of Meeting Madness (And How To Avoid It)

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The office meeting can be the newest place to hang out, or alternatively, it can be the place where much work is accomplished. Australia’s cities definitely have enough hangout spots, so your office meeting should be the one place to take care of business. The problem relates to retaining the attention of meeting members without skimping on valuable information they might need to take care of business. Most of the problems that cause a meeting to fail relate to setting the stage so that when attendees do arrive they are primed to listen to presenters.

Common problems associated with making a meeting dreary include meetings that last too long or meetings that are very tangential. Other issues that can make a meeting an unpleasant experience relate to the meeting unravelling and facilitators having little control over the room and command over the discussion. Regardless of the size of the room, by following a few simple rules your business can avoid the common woes of the modern business meeting.

Continue reading to find out how you can make your meetings go off without a hitch and avoid major meeting mishaps.

Where

Meeting room space is prime real estate in some office buildings, and to make sure you have an appropriate place that comfortably seats attendees is another way to guarantee a successful meeting. State-of-the-art meeting rooms similar to Servcorp meeting rooms have the latest technologies that can make the meeting experience great for both presenter and attendees. Alternatively, meeting rooms that are cramped and do not have the requisite equipment can have the opposite effect.

Who

When organising a meeting, one of the best ways to guarantee the meeting goes on without any major snags is to announce the meeting well in advance to attendees. Send reminders the week before the meeting, which clearly state the location, time, presenters, and purpose. A million things happen in the course of the business day, and for those with a packed schedule, one reminder can mean the difference between someone who makes the meeting and someone who does not.

What

Many meetings that are routinely held have a number of topics to be covered with little focus. As the speaker moves through the topics, attendees might or might not listen to the topics. The worst thing that can happen is that staff members begin to feel like the meetings are a waste a time, and while attending meetings is a part of the job, the goal is to create an atmosphere where attendees pay attention to the message being conveyed.

Clearly understanding the goal of the meeting can be one way to effectively guarantee that meeting attendees not only are active listeners but participate in the discussion. This is primarily because your goal, or the task you want to accomplish, will help you build the agenda. While it might seem obvious, clearly understanding what the goal is in the meeting can prevent going into a meeting with a number of topics to cover but no focus.

And Why

The purpose of the meeting, which, if well-organised, will be addressed on the agenda. Your agenda should list all of the topics covered in the discussion, and if done well, they will be centred on one theme. Leave a few minutes at the beginning so that late arrivals won’t interrupt valuable information and at the end to address questions tabled during the meeting.

Avoiding Meeting Madness

Well-coordinated meetings always have the most positive effect on attendees, and simply because they clearly address the goal and purpose of the meeting. Furthermore, this clarity reduces that amount of time simply because conversations are structured. Finally, clear directives given in a short amount of time create opportunities for active engagement.

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